My wife and kids will tell you that I'm rather opinionated about the state of music today- and, strangely enough, even more so on the topic of heavy metal. And, yes, I said heavy metal. Yes, I am somewhat of a "jazzer", but I listen to everything, or at least try to.
First, let's say what heavy metal is: Black Sabbath, Led Zeppelin, Iron
Maiden, Judas Priest, Motorhead, early Metallica, Dokken, Living Color,
Pantera, early Slayer, Megadeth, Dio, Ozzy, Rainbow, Sevendust and
anything with Tony Iommi, Richie Blackmoor, Randy Rhoads, Dimebag
Darrell, KK Downing, Steve Harris, Paul D'Anno, or Rob Halford in it. I
will go as far as to say that bands like AC/DC, Kiss and a few others
that skirt the edge of classic rock, as well as things like Dream
Theater and Tool also fall into this category. (And, no- I'm not
interested in what you call heavy metal.)
Second- let's say what heavy metal is not: Darned near anything else that calls itself metal- especially these days. Specifically, I'll state that bands like Mudvayne, Cannibal Corpse, Napalm Death, new Metallica, Mastodon, Killswitch Engage, Into The Moat, Korn, Limp Bizkit, Bring Me The Horizon, As I Lay Dying, Gwar and, yeah- even Opeth (my apologies to the Swedes) are no more metal than say, Abba. I dare you headbang to "Dancing Queen". Go ahead. I'll wait.
(And, before I go too much further, let me again state- I am not interested in what you call "metal". This is my blog. Get your own.)
Now, let's get specific. Both my son and my wife are what I like to call "rivet heads"- they enjoy a bunch of different bands, and make regular trips to various concert venues around Seattle to see some bands that tout themselves as metal, but I can't stand them. It's not the cookie monster vocals that bother me. It's not the "black magic", death images or even the satan worship stuff that bothers me. (The satan worship cracks me up, actually) It's not the screaming, unintelligible lyrics; the crunching guitars; the swearing; the constant barrage of sexual and dismemberment images; the darkness- none of that bothers me. It's just schtick.
What bothers me is the kick drum. What????!???
It used to be that heavy metal had some lyrically social relevance and actually required a certain amount of ability for all the players to pull it off. Now, all it requires is a drummer with a double-kick pedal that functions like a pneumatic jack-hammer and at least 2 guitar players who do nothing but play dropped D5 chords that sit on top of the kick drum firings, and you have what people call "heavy metal". There's no concept of major, minor, diminished, half-diminished chords, no semblance of melody and certainly no semblance of style - and all the tunes are the same thing, regurgitated, straight from whoever can tune down the lowest. Even a lot of the theatrics are gone. Heavy metal is now nothing more than a shriek and a kick drum, and all the "new metal" - all of it - is completely and totally irrelevant. No one tries anything new anymore.
The other evening, as I was driving home from a jazz gig, I was trying like mad get "All The Things You Are" out of my head, so I flipped on Sirius Radio and tuned into one of the metal stations, and I was immediately struck by the fact that every, single, solitary band sounded exactly alike. I thought, "ok, Marc- you've turned into your dad" and felt sick to my stomach at the very thought of it. (My dad considers Supertramp to be "hard rock"........yeesh.) Then I flipped to one station who was playing "Wishing Well" from Sabbath's "Heaven And Hell" as a tribute to Ronnie James Dio (someone who is TRULY deserving of many, many tributes) and I was equally struck by the absolute genius of it all. It's dark. It's stylized. It's got intelligence. It's got balls. Dio sings like his head is about to come off and fly through the speakers. I turned it up to about the highest the radio could go, and reveled in its dark glory.
Last night, while on (yet another jazz) gig, I found myself talking to one of my guitarist's students, who was obviously another rivet head. We got to talking about what his band does, and he proceeded to tell me that they all "tune down to B!" (like that's impressive) and that most of their songs are centered around "the B note", and once again, I was saddened to hear this.
Why has this happened? What took guys like Yngwie Malmsteen and Rising Force and made them into The Jonas Brothers with Cookie Monster from Sesame Street on vocals? Doesn't anyone care anymore? I miss the days of Maiden and Priest- bands who had something to say and a way to say it that was original - and I desperately now believe that all double kick pedals should be removed from all but Dennis Chambers' feet. How about you metal-heads- you know who you are- learn a couple of actual chords - not barre chords, by the way- and learn to write a song rather than a kick pedal ornamentation? What you're doing isn't heavy- it's just crap.
First, let's say what heavy metal is: Black Sabbath, Led Zeppelin, Iron
Maiden, Judas Priest, Motorhead, early Metallica, Dokken, Living Color,
Pantera, early Slayer, Megadeth, Dio, Ozzy, Rainbow, Sevendust and
anything with Tony Iommi, Richie Blackmoor, Randy Rhoads, Dimebag
Darrell, KK Downing, Steve Harris, Paul D'Anno, or Rob Halford in it. I
will go as far as to say that bands like AC/DC, Kiss and a few others
that skirt the edge of classic rock, as well as things like Dream
Theater and Tool also fall into this category. (And, no- I'm not
interested in what you call heavy metal.)
Second- let's say what heavy metal is not: Darned near anything else that calls itself metal- especially these days. Specifically, I'll state that bands like Mudvayne, Cannibal Corpse, Napalm Death, new Metallica, Mastodon, Killswitch Engage, Into The Moat, Korn, Limp Bizkit, Bring Me The Horizon, As I Lay Dying, Gwar and, yeah- even Opeth (my apologies to the Swedes) are no more metal than say, Abba. I dare you headbang to "Dancing Queen". Go ahead. I'll wait.
(And, before I go too much further, let me again state- I am not interested in what you call "metal". This is my blog. Get your own.)
Now, let's get specific. Both my son and my wife are what I like to call "rivet heads"- they enjoy a bunch of different bands, and make regular trips to various concert venues around Seattle to see some bands that tout themselves as metal, but I can't stand them. It's not the cookie monster vocals that bother me. It's not the "black magic", death images or even the satan worship stuff that bothers me. (The satan worship cracks me up, actually) It's not the screaming, unintelligible lyrics; the crunching guitars; the swearing; the constant barrage of sexual and dismemberment images; the darkness- none of that bothers me. It's just schtick.
What bothers me is the kick drum. What????!???
It used to be that heavy metal had some lyrically social relevance and actually required a certain amount of ability for all the players to pull it off. Now, all it requires is a drummer with a double-kick pedal that functions like a pneumatic jack-hammer and at least 2 guitar players who do nothing but play dropped D5 chords that sit on top of the kick drum firings, and you have what people call "heavy metal". There's no concept of major, minor, diminished, half-diminished chords, no semblance of melody and certainly no semblance of style - and all the tunes are the same thing, regurgitated, straight from whoever can tune down the lowest. Even a lot of the theatrics are gone. Heavy metal is now nothing more than a shriek and a kick drum, and all the "new metal" - all of it - is completely and totally irrelevant. No one tries anything new anymore.
The other evening, as I was driving home from a jazz gig, I was trying like mad get "All The Things You Are" out of my head, so I flipped on Sirius Radio and tuned into one of the metal stations, and I was immediately struck by the fact that every, single, solitary band sounded exactly alike. I thought, "ok, Marc- you've turned into your dad" and felt sick to my stomach at the very thought of it. (My dad considers Supertramp to be "hard rock"........yeesh.) Then I flipped to one station who was playing "Wishing Well" from Sabbath's "Heaven And Hell" as a tribute to Ronnie James Dio (someone who is TRULY deserving of many, many tributes) and I was equally struck by the absolute genius of it all. It's dark. It's stylized. It's got intelligence. It's got balls. Dio sings like his head is about to come off and fly through the speakers. I turned it up to about the highest the radio could go, and reveled in its dark glory.Last night, while on (yet another jazz) gig, I found myself talking to one of my guitarist's students, who was obviously another rivet head. We got to talking about what his band does, and he proceeded to tell me that they all "tune down to B!" (like that's impressive) and that most of their songs are centered around "the B note", and once again, I was saddened to hear this.
2 comments:
Preach it, brother.
Someone's a little cranky. Actually, a well-timed opinion. I was seriously thinking about getting a double pedal and pulling my chops out of the past in an effort to become a more "relevant" drummer. But then I remembered...I don't really like double-bass ejaculations all that much. I think I can display my angst more effectively with a single beater and some decent dexterity. Oh, and imagination. Thanks Marc!
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